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British Based Italians to Lead G Spot Research

The News - Latest News
Written by Jack   

Posted 21 Feb 2008

Italian Stud AdvertisementToday's Tea Musk Ripped Headline deals with the vexing problem of the G Spot or as it is often called "The Female Pleasure Zone".

This is the text used in the headline:

Hardened Italian Stallions Volunteer for G Spot Research

Italian researcher Emmanuele Jannini, says, "YES, the G spot does exist", British New Scientist reports.

Jannini tested just twenty women using an ultrasound scan to locate the fabled and elusive pleasure spot. Women who do not have a G spot should not despair, according to the New Scientist report.

Experienced Italian G Spot researchers, living in Great Britain, have volunteered their services to confirm Jannini's belief that the G spot is missing in British women who don't experience vaginal orgasm.

Tory Leader Rejects G Spot Tax Policy
A puritan pleasure tax may be an option under a future Tory government's secret agenda

Here is a direct link to the headline image:

http://www.teamusk.com/images/teamusk-headlines-g-spot.gif
Write your own spoof headline based on real news headlines at www.teamusk.com

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Sick Notes Can Turn Into a Death Sentence

The News - Latest News
Written by Jack   

The Department of Health recently released figures show that people who are on incapacity benefit for one year are likely to stay there for eight years. Once they have been "on-the-sick" for two years or more, they are more likely to die or retire than work again.

Health Secretary Alan Johnson seems to have taken up the battle against "The Great British Work Shy Sick" as he has compared GB (not Gormless Gordon - Great Briton) unfavourably with the rest of Europe yet again.

Perhaps Alan Johnson is angling for a new cabinet post of "Secretary for Death" which, I guess would give him the acronym:

SOD (off) Johnson... as he is already known at most outside smoking venues of empty, near bankrupt pubs and clubs.

The real question is why people are not being treated quickly and effectively by the NHS or do doctors simple give up on the sick and vulnerable in our society after one year?

Seems to me, tax payers money would be better spent treating sick people than demonising them through the press and media.

The Tea Musk Times Ripped Headline for Today

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Introduction to the East of England a Selection of Places to Visit

The News - Latest News
Written by Jack   
Peterborough, the Gateway to the Fens
Destinations - European Destinations
Written by Passepartout
Peterborough Cathedral SquareThe cathedral city of Peterborough is situated on the River Nene, in a notoriously flat and low-lying area that in some places lies below sea level. The area known as the Fens falls to the east of Peterborough.

Whether your interests are sightseeing, stately homes, shopping, history, river trips, markets, entertainment, activities, sports, events or eating out, Peterborough has something for all tastes and ages. There are acres of green open spaces, lakes and riverside parkland, a wide choice of places to eat, a thriving nightlife and a lively arts scene. Peterborough enjoys a a full programme of events both national and international, including the annual East of England Show, Peterborough Festival and CAMRA beer festival, the UKs biggest undercover beer festival, which takes place on the river embankment at the end of August each year.
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Ely, the Tiny Ancient Cathedral City in the Fens
Destinations - European Destinations
Written by Passepartout

Ely, CambridgeshireNestled in the Fen countryside of East Cambridgeshire, the historic city of Ely is home to one of the most magnificent cathedrals in England, and makes an ideal day visit or short break location. Situated on the River Great Ouse, Ely was an island and a significant port until the 18th century when the Fens were drained, leaving it high and dry. The name itself means 'eel island', and certainly the low lying fens were historically very marshy and rich in eels - it's even been claimed that, during the 11th century, monks of the town would use eels as currency to pay their taxes!

Today, the city is very attractive, retaining many historic buildings with its winding shopping streets. From the lovely riverside you can enjoy a boat trip, leisurely riverside walks, explore the many cafes and antique shops, visit the Babylon Art Gallery or listen to music in Jubilee Gardens.

Whether it is a tranquil, peaceful retreat you are looking for or an inspiring, invigorating visit then the tiny but bustling city of Ely has it all!

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Lincoln, an Historic and Vibrant Cathedral City
Destinations - European Destinations
Written by Passepartout

Lincoln, LincolnshireHistory and heritage or culture and vibrancy, the contemporary cathedral city of Lincoln is one of the UK’s Top 10 favourite cities. Lincoln has so much to offer you will be spoilt for choice. As well as all the historical sites there are parklands and open spaces to enjoy a relaxing stroll. Numerous cafes, bars and restaurants provide a range of menus including some of the favourite local food. Enjoy a traditional English tea at one of the tea shops. Visit the annual Christmas market for some traditional Christmas gifts. Lincoln is a compact city so everything is accessible on foot. Enjoy!

Arrival and Information

Both Lincoln's train station , on St Mary's Street, and its bus station , close by off Norman Street, are located "Down hill" in the city centre. From either, it's a steep, twenty-minute walk to the cathedral, which can also be reached by city bus or (depending on the success of various trials) an electric "people carrier". There are two tourist offices . One is in the shopping centre on The Cornhill, close to the train and bus stations (Easter-Sept Mon-Thurs 9.30am-5.30pm, Fri 9.30am-5pm, Sat 10am-5pm; Oct-Easter same days, but closes 4pm; tel 01522/579056, ), the other is at 9 Castle Hill, between the cathedral and the castle (same hours; tel 01522/529828, ). Both have a useful range of literature on Lincoln and its surroundings, take bookings for guided tours of the city, and operate an accommodation-booking service.

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The high definition optical disc format war is over

The News - Latest News
Written by Webbie   

It seems the format war over next-generation DVDs between Sony, in the Blu-ray corner, and Toshiba, in the HD DVD camp, may be over, meaning consumers seeking sharper movies on high-definition DVDs no longer have to choose between rival incompatible formats and run the risk of being stuck with a 21st century equivalent of Betamax -- Sony's videotape technology that lost out to VHS in the 1980s.

As long as there's been technology, there's been competing standards, right from George Stephenson and Isambard Kingdom Brunel promoting different rail gauges in the early days of the railways and onwards to the present day, when 'format wars' in media distribution are commonplace.

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Advertising Experiment Using Blinkx Video Ads

The News - Latest News
Written by Jack   

The AskJack web site "lives and breaths" only because of revenue generated through on screen advertising.

AskJack's primary source of context adverts is Google Adwords and Mirago PPC search results displayed using the AskJack Research Tool: www.askjack.co.uk/search/london+nightclubs a very quick way to get filtered search results and further research options.

Results from in-depth research and development by 32 Corners Ltd (owners of AJ) carried out during the last year, has revealed a certain distaste for "in-your-face" advertisements and a certain blindness to text ads by a significant percentage of visitors. The evidence for this can be calculated through failing revenues and less time being spent on information pages.

A survey of fifty regular Internet users found that these are three most hated forms of online advertising:

  • Floating ad layers that mask the important page information and require a click to close the ad. Often this will trigger a "pop-under" new web page to open in the background.
  • Pop-under or pop-over pages opening as new browser windows.
  • Animated banners flashing at a frequency rate that could cause headaches or epileptic fits.

Making Money Online Can be Hard Work for Ardvarks

Most people contact in the survey didn't seem to mind some advertising being displayed in a web page, providing it didn't overwhelm the content and was at least relevant to the information being presented.

Blinkx.com, the online video search engine has a PPC program similar to the contextual ad system used by Adsense Video. Blinkx claim to be able to deliver ads that match video content in a non intrusive way. It is up-to the web site owner to make sure videos that any displayed videos are actually relevant to page content.

This article aims to explore the way Blikx ads actually work, the set-up process and ways to make additional revenue.

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A Solution for Developing Joomla Templates Using Microsoft FrontPage

The News - Latest News
Written by Jack   
Tea Musk TimesThe Reason Why - I Don't Like Being Bullied by Moronic Joomla "Experts"

A couple of weeks ago I posted a question to one of the many Joomla help forums:

"Is it possible to develop Joomla templates using Microsoft FrontPage as the main WYSIWYG editor?

Does anyone have any helpful tips or suggestions to help with this project?"

Well, to my dismay I was bombarded with "flame" after "flame" replies in the forum. It seems there's a lot of Joomla designers out there who absolutely HATE the idea of Microsoft, Microsoft FrontPage, HTML table code and (in there esteemed, unenlightened opinion) ANYONE stupid enough to consider building a Joomla template using ANY Microsoft product.

I replied to first person's vile response by explaining that I have been using FP for over twelve years. I know it has limitations and faults. However, it was one of the first programs that allowed web developers to actually see what the web page under development actually looks like while data was being inputted. This speeded up the whole development process and probably aided the growth of the Internet as a whole. FrontPage was designed to interact with all of the Microsoft Office Programs and that probably accounts for many of the perceived bugs user often come up against.

This (reasonable and polite) comment was met with absolute derision and outright hostility by many of the forum members. Not only did the forum replies become far more abusive, someone also did a bit of research and found my email address. They then began an email spam campaign of such intensity that I had to close the email account down.

So be warned; so called "Joomla Support Forums" can be dangerous places to ask innocent questions about FrontPage, unless you intend to trash the software and anyone using it.

OK... This is MY RESPONSE

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A few Tasty Tips for Microsoft FrontPage

The News - Latest News
Written by Webbie   

Although Microsoft discontinued FrontPage in 2006, replacing it with Microsoft SharePoint Designer and Microsoft Expression Web, there are still very many people using the older software both professionally and personally to build their websites. It will probably be several years yet FrontPage-designed websites disappear completely from the ever-changing face of the internet.

The tips below are for FrontPage 2000, but the list of links at the end gives resources offering useful tips and tricks for other FP versions too.

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A Free Bundle of Nature and Landscape Photo Techniques

Macro - Panoramics
Written by Jack   

Three short Photography articles bundled together for easy reference. Composition, foreground and background focus issues and getting your timing right to capture the best lighting conditions.

Although these articles do not mention panoramic photography, all of the tips, comments and advice are just as relevant even if you're taking a three shot Fisheye picture or a twenty four shot picture using a calibrated bracket and tripod head.

Thumbnail of: Landscape photo taken very close to the ground using infinity as the focus settingNature and Landscape Photography Tips: Composition

A guide to improving your nature photos, including composition and corner-focus. One those occasions when you're lucky enough to be in the right place at the right time, you really can admire the beauty of nature. But capturing those picturesque moments is not as easy as it might seem. There are many different aspects to consider when taking landscape and photos, but in this article, I'll just touch on composition.

Nature And Landscape Photography Tips - Foreground Vs. Background

A guide on striking a balance between foreground and background when taking photographs. Something many people looking to improve their landscape photos should do is to use a proper foreground. Of course, you can take a beautiful ocean or sunset and I'm sure it looks lovely. Still, it likely looks just any other ocean or landscape photo that millions of other people have taken. You should try being a little more unique. Like a ninja, use the surrounding objects to your advantage. If you're on a beach, see if you can stand near a cool rock formation, jetty or dock and place that in the foreground.

Nature and Landscape Photography Tips - It's All About Timing

A brief guide on how to capture magical moments in your photography and improve your timing. You know how that famous saying goes: It's all about timing. It goes for a lot of things in life, and in many cases in landscape photography, it's true. There's something special about the angle that light hits objects when the sun is setting or when it's rising. There's such a wide spectrum of colours that you can get from the 30 minutes before and 30 minutes after sunrise or sunset is so broad and amazing. In the middle of this time period, you need pay special attention to cloud formations, weather, shadows and the colour changes in the sky, water and objects you plan to include in your photos.

Read more...
 
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